Looking sideways

I think I am too old to understand ghosting. So much so, that I don’t even know if I am being ghosted. To be fair, I don’t know much of what’s happening right now, in this particular situation. Everything seemed to be normal, until everything stopped. For no obvious reason - at least not obvious to me. My gut feeling says that something changed, but it also says that this is not the end. The latter might be some wishful thinking, though. Maybe it is the end. Or maybe it hasn't even begun yet.  We need to consider entropy here: things that should happen will eventually happen, given time. In this situation, there wasn't any time for anything to happen, for good or for bad. We didn't have time to get to know each other properly. He didn't have time to get bored of me. And I didn't have time to fuck this up yet.*  Logically, it's probably a case of bad timing. Too much happening and too many complications, from both sides. This all seem very clear to my mind. But t...

I had to explain this to many people, many times, over and over again, so I thought it would be a good idea to write about it. Put it in words, so I can refer to this if I need to explain it to someone. It might sound impersonal, but maybe I can just send this to them when they ask me to talk about why I am acting the way I am. I wouldn't forgo a real conversation with them completely, but this could be a way to build a background. For them to see what is going on in my head before we even start to chat. Because this is about me, not them. And it's fairly consistent in my life, often regardless of who triggers it. I won't stick to the reasons for it, because I might need a whole encyclopaedia to explore everything I know about myself ther could be the used to explain these behaviours. And I'm pretty sure that what I know is just the tip of the iceberg. So no, I'm not gonna go into the whys. I will try to stick to the facts. The first fact is that I often feel like I...