Looking sideways

As I sat inside that church, during one of the lowest points of my life, I felt the vibration of the multiple drums going through my body, even though the sound of those instruments was muffled and unclear. Bolero, with its increasing intensity, was playing through my noise cancelling headphones, blocking any attempts of sounds to penetrate from outside. I gazed into the grandiosity of that atrium, the paths taken by the shockwaves caused by those instruments, how it went around the curves made of concrete, and made its way back to move me whilst it failed to make itself heard. Suddenly, something else hit me: I suppose I have a thing for killing. That is a bold statement, so before you plant multiple red flags all over me, embody Lady Gaga screaming "KILLAH" and dial whatever 3 (or more) digit number the police uses wherever you are, let me expand and clarify this. I don't mean literally killing someone, the physical act of taking someone's life. In fact, one of my f...

That ship has sailed, for us both. It was one simple act, for a few minutes, but it changed our story forever. Neither of us will ever be able to say that we have never done this. And that haunts me now. When I heard what you had done, the room around me disappeared. The floor vanished, and suddenly I was floating in this empty space where things changed forever. I started shaking. I went into survival mode, and I hated you. Like I never hated anyone before, ever. Deep down inside, I wish you had never been born, that you had never come into our lives. I felt disgust for you. I did not understand these feelings then, and perhaps this is one of the reasons why things unfolded they way they did. When we met again, I did something very wrong. I said the right things, I have strong arguments to justify why I did it, and I had the best interests of those involved at heart. But the way I acted was wrong, and suddenly I went down to the same level as you. Here I was, doing to you what I, just...

Just a quick update: I finally walked up to the guy at the bus stop and talked to him. We only chatted for a few minutes, and he was lovely. It's been half an hour since, and I'm still shaking. G.U.Y. - Lady Gaga (Artpop, who'd have thought...)